DavidDiNozzo
by SpecialAgentWho13
Summary: A series of short, related stories involving Tony, Ziva, and their children. Tiva, McAbby. Rated T only to be safe. AU, of course.
1. Breakfast

Hey guys, I was just bored the other day and decided to start writing this. It is just a series of linked short stories and I suppose in my mind it is kind of taking place after season 7 but I don't know what will happen in the finale and in season 8 so it doesn't really count that stuff. Mostly the story is just AU though. Please read, review, and enjoy! I'll be posting another chapter fairly soon.

~**NZA**

* * *

Ziva opened her eyes and glanced down as she sensed a presence nearby. She found a pair of bright green eyes staring up at her intently. "Good morning," she whispered, pulling her two-year-old son up onto the bed with her. On her other side, Tony was still asleep, snoring lightly.  
"How did you get out of your crib, Shai?" Ziva sighed. "I suppose it is time to get you a normal bed, hmm?"  
"Yeah," Tony said, waking up with a yawn. "He inherited your ninja genes. Of course the kid can leap crib railings in a single bound."  
Ziva chuckled in response and the toddler in her arms giggled at his parents' interaction.  
"Ima! Daddy! I made you bweakfast!" a small, excited voice announced from the doorway. Tony and Ziva looked up and smiled at their other son. The boy was like a mini Ziva in every way except for his smile. Four-year-old Caleb had a DiNozzo grin on his face, chocolate brown eyes sparkling as he carefully carried a tray over to Tony's side of the bed.  
"I made toast," he pointed to the two slices of nearly-burnt bread with huge lumps of butter on each. "And I bwought you oranges and bananas and milk too!" The little boy smiled, very proud of himself. The bananas were a bit bruised, probably from being dropped, and the milk was contained in dinosaur sippy cups but Tony and Ziva ate it all anyway, Ziva sharing pieces of the fruit with Shai.  
When they had finished, Tony leaned back against the headboard of the bed and Caleb, now lying between him and Ziva, did the same. "Mmm! That was a great breakfast, buddy, thanks."  
"Yes baby, great job," agreed Ziva. "Are you hungry, my love? Would you like some pancakes or cereal?"  
"Yeah, pancakes! With peanut butter! Please?"  
Tony sat up straight. "Ooh, sounds good to me. I could go for some pancakes, sweetcheeks."  
"Dad," Shai said and he crawled over Ziva and placed himself on his father's lap. "No." The two-year-old smacked Tony's shirtless hairy chest with his tiny hand.  
"Ow!" Tony cried. "What was that for, you wild little ninja?"  
"You be nice. Say please," the toddler crossed his arms over his small chest, still sitting cross-legged on Tony's lap. At this, Ziva laughed and the boys giggled along with her but Tony just stuck his bottom lip out in a pout.  
"Okay, fine," he eventually relented after the laughter had ceased. "I could go for some pancakes PLEASE, sweetcheeks..."  
Ziva chuckled once more before getting out of bed. She picked the empty breakfast tray and dishes up off the nightstand. "Alright, alright. I will make pancakes. In the meantime," she said, looking back at her husband as she walked out the door, "you can change Shai's diaper."  
Tony just groaned before lifting the toddler up and hoisting him into his arms.


	2. Bath Time

Thanks so much to all the people who reviewed and/or added this story to their story alerts or favorites! Here's the next chapter. Reviews are greatly appreciated! :)

~**NZA**

**Reason for repost: **I changed Caleb's middle name. Why? Just for the heck of it, I guess.

Ziva groaned as she set down the breakfast dishes she was cleaning and picked up her ringing cell phone.  
"David," she answered. She still used her maiden name at work for convenience.  
"Ziva. We've got a case, you and DiNozzo get your asses down here. And bring the boys with you," Gibbs ordered. "Abby will watch 'em while we're gone."  
"Yes, Gibbs. Be there in twenty-five minutes." She increased the amount of time they actually needed, knowing her boss would shorten it by at least five minutes.  
"You've got twenty," he said and hung up.  
Ziva sighed and went to the boys' bathroom, where Tony was giving Shai and Caleb a bath... Well, it was more like they were giving _him_ a bath.  
"Ahhh!" Tony screamed as another wave of water splashed from the tub onto his already soaked shirt. "Shai! No more splashing! Hey! Don't- Ahh!" Ziva leaned against the doorframe, Watching and laughing quietly.  
"Caleb Jethro David-DiNozzo, sit your naked little butt back down or I will get your mom in here! I mean it!" Caleb plopped back down and another wave of water hit Tony.  
"Ima is already here, Dad," the boy said, pointing to his mother who was still in the doorway.  
Ziva laughed, smiling at her children and harried husband. "I thought I told you two to be nice to your father. Tony, we have to go in to work. A new case. I will finish up in here, you go get ready."  
"Oh, thank God! Love ya, sweetcheeks." Tony stood and walked over to her. He put his hands on her thin waist and leaned down, covering her mouth with his in a deep kiss.  
"Ick, Daddy. Don't eat Ima. You just had bweakfast!"  
Ziva chuckled into his mouth and pulled back. "Maybe tonight, after the kids are in bed, we can... have some fun, hm?" she whispered, patting Tony once on the cheek before pushing him out the door.  
Turning to her boys she said, "Okay, time to get dressed. You two get to see Gibbs, Abby, McGee, and Ducky today."  
"And Jimmy too? I like him, he acts funny," Caleb said as she dried him off.  
Ziva smiled. "Yes, Jimmy too." After drying Shai off too and wrapping him in the towel, she stood and lifted the bundled up toddler into her arms and led Caleb, who refused to keep his towel on, towards his bedroom.  
She got them dressed quickly and handed them off to Tony just as he stepped out of their own bathroom, showered and dressed. "We have ten minutes," she told him. She pecked him on the cheek and stepped past him into bathroom.  
"Oh, goody," Tony said as he led Caleb and Shai into the living room. "I just _love_ spending my weekends at work!"  
Shai, who was in his father's arms, reached up and patted Tony on the cheek. "It okay, Dad. No whine," he said.  
"Yeah, yeah," Tony grumbled. "I know."


	3. In the Lab

Here's the next one! Read, review and enjoy please! :)

There probably won't be updates for a few days. I need to write chapters for some of my other stories.

**Reason for repost: **I changed Abby and McGee's daughter's name. Just wanted it to have some meaning.

Once Ziva had left after dropping off Caleb and Shai, Abby kneeled down to their level. "Hey, boys!" she greeted. "What's up?"  
"We splashed Daddy in the bath this morning!" Caleb laughed and walked around the cheerful forensic scientist, pulling himself up onto her chair. "It was fun. But then he said he would get Ima but she was already there and she dried us off so Dad could get ready." He tried to spin himself on the chair but he couldn't reach the edge of the desk. "Oh! And guess what, Abby?"  
"I don't know," she replied with extra enthusiasm. "What?"  
"I made Ima and Daddy bweakfast!" He finally grabbed hold of the desk, pushing as hard as he could and the chair began to spin. Shai was giggling hysterically at his spinning big brother and Abby couldn't help but laugh too. "And Ima made pancakes!"  
After a few seconds, Abby reached out and stopped the chair before the little boy could fly off. Caleb jumped down, wobbled a little, and finally took a seat on the mat Abby had laid out. Shai toddled after him and plopped down on top of Bert, whom Abby had placed there shortly before the kids had arrived.  
"Phhhhhtttt!" The two-year-old squealed with laughter at the noise the stuffed hippo made, clapping his hands and bouncing up and down so the toy would make more noises. "Phht. Phhtt. Phhhhhtttt!"  
"Auntie Abby?"  
Abby turned from Shai to Caleb. _He looks so much like Ziva it's scary_, she thought. "Yes?"  
"Where are Jacob and Katie?"  
"McGee and I dropped them off at daycare on our way here this morning," she replied, wishing her own kids could be there to play.  
Her son, Jacob, was three and a half and her daughter Caitlin was one. Katie looked a lot like Abby, with her dark hair and upbeat personality and Jacob was like a mini McGee.  
She was startled out of her reverie when she heard the elevator ding a few minutes later.  
"Hey, Abs," Tony greeted, entering the lab with a box of evidence. He set it down on the lab table and handed her the chain-of-evidence clipboard to sign. "Well, here's all the evidence. Lots of fingerprints. Good luck."  
"Thanks, Tony!" Abby enveloped him in a suffocating hug.  
"Uhh..Abby? Can't breathe!"  
"Oh! Sorry, Tony."  
"S'okay. C'mon, boys. Let's go upstairs and let Abby work." He picked Shai up and took Caleb by the hand.  
"Dad?" said Caleb as they were waiting for the elevator.  
"Yeah, buddy?"  
"You stink."  
"Uh huh," Shai agreed with a smile.


	4. Bedtime

Okay, here's the next chapter. I have two more written so I'll be posting those soon. Sorry for the delay but I've been lazy in updating. And also, I apologize about the...awkward formatting. Hmm even the word awkward looks awkward..Anyway I'm getting off track. Sorry about the formatting. I write these on my iPod and then send them to my computer and this is the best I can do in terms of making them look nice. If it really bothers anyone I will stop doing it if you ask but that _might_ mean less-frequent updates. Okay, I think I've talked enough for now. Enjoy! And reviews are greatly appreciated. :)

~**NZA**

* * *

"Shai."  
"No."  
"C'mon, buddy. Let's get your pajamas on. It's time for bed."  
"Nooo."  
"Yes. Come here."  
Tony was tired from the long day at work and having to go through this with his youngest son just added to his exhaustion.  
"Uh uh." Shai shook his head and plopped down on the floor in the corner of his bedroom.  
"Shai," Tony warned, "don't make me get your mother in here." The toddler's eyes widened. "I will if you don't come here and get your pj's on."  
Shai stood and walked over to his father, sulking. After he was in his dinosaur pajamas, he sat down and picked up a toy car from the floor next to him. "We watch movie?" he asked and looked up at Tony with the sparkling green eyes that were identical to his father's.  
"No, buddy. Not tonight. It's time to go to sleep. Daddy's tired."  
Tony rubbed a hand over his face. He was about ready to pass out right there in Shai's room.  
"Daaaaad." Shai stuck out his bottom lip in a pout and crossed his arms over his chest. "Pease watch mooovieee. Meno."  
"It's 'Nemo', buddy. And no. Time for bed. Come here." Tony leaned against Shai's crib and beckoned the boy over. The two-year-old shook his head furiously and ran out of the room as fast as his little legs could carry him. Tony was just about to chase after him when Ziva walked in with Shai in her arms, a smirk on her face and a pout back in place on their son's.  
"Caleb is in bed already. Why don't you go say good night to him and get ready for bed?" she suggested.  
"'Kay," he replied groggily and pushed himself away from the crib and towards the door. Before he left, he kissed Shai's forehead and gave Ziva a peck on the lips.  
Ziva sighed. "Alright, my love. Let us get you into bed, hmm? I promised your father some alone time tonight."  
"Yes." Shai leaned his head on his mother's shoulder as she walked toward the crib. Carefully, Ziva laid him down and covered him with the soft blue blanket that had been bundled up in the corner. She gently kissed the toddler's forehead as Tony had done minutes before.  
"Goodnight, baby," she whispered. Ziva flicked the light off and quietly walked out of the room and down the hall towards her and Tony's bedroom.


	5. Like Gibbs

Okay here's the next chapter. Extremely small and really no point to it I guess. Enjoy!

~**NZA**

* * *

"I'm the boss, Shai. I'm like Gibbs. And I'm telling you to take pictures and get the evidence." Tony grinned as he walked into the livingroom and saw Caleb looking just like his mom with his hands on his hips and Ziva's NCIS cap on his head. On the floor in front of his older brother, Shai sat frowning while Caleb acted like Gibbs. Tony's own hat was on his head and was so big on the two-year-old that it was covering his eyes.  
"Hey, guys, what's goin' on here?" Tony asked as he strolled towards his boys.  
"This is a crime scene, Dad. Be careful or you will contanimate evidence."  
"Contaminate, buddy. Not contanimate. But it's okay, you still speak better English than your mom." Tony winced as a hand came in contact with the back of his head.  
"Watch it, _baali_," Ziva whispered in his ear. She licked his ear lobe seductively before quickly darting out of the reach of his hand and scooping Shai up in her arms.  
"Hey, no fair," Tony whined.  
"Ima, gross!" Caleb said, observing his parents' interaction.  
"What, Caleb?" Ziva asked, amused.  
"You licked Daddy!" the little boy exclaimed. "Does he even taste good?"  
Both Tony and Ziva began laughing hysterically while Caleb and Shai stared at each other in confusion.

* * *

Yeah. Pretty short. Okay well most people probably know from the context that "Ima" means mom/mother in Hebrew but in case you didn't, there you go. And "baali" means "my husband."

If you are interested, some authors have pictures to go with their stories so I thought I might try that with this one. There are links to pictures on my profile of what I kind of imagine the kids looking like (Caleb, Shai, Jacob, and Lindsay).

Reviews welcomed! Thanks! :)


	6. Let's Play

Okay. I must admit that I have had this chapter for about 2 weeks and I have just been too lazy to post. So I really do apologize...Now I sound like Ducky. Anyway, enjoy the chapter, review much appreciated! :)

* * *

"Ima?"  
Ziva marked her place in the book with her index finger and glanced up. "Yes, Caleb?"  
"Are you busy?"  
"Not really. Why? Are you hungry, my love?"  
"No...I was just wondering something."  
"And what is that?" Ziva asked.  
"Would you play piano with me?"  
"Of course, Caleb. Where are your brother and father?" She stuck her bookmark in and placed the book on the coffee table, following Caleb to the grand piano that sat in the corner of the living room.  
"Playing in Shai's room. Dad is making those strange noises with the cars again," Caleb said as he pulled himself up onto the piano bench.  
Ziva chuckled. "Okay. What would like to play first?"  
"Will you play Comptine, Ima?"  
"Sure." Ziva began to play the song as Caleb watched intently, trying to memorize what his mother was doing. Having heard the melodic sounds of the piano, Tony and Shai had wandered in and were now sitting on the couch listening quietly. As the song came to an end, Ziva turned to her son with a smile.  
"What next?" she asked.  
"Umm. Let's play Fur Elise. You play bottom, I play top?"  
"Sure, tateleh."  
When they finished, Caleb and Ziva turned around and bowed as Tony and Shai clapped. Shai slid down off the couch and ran to his mother.  
"Ima you wonnerful," he told Ziva as she hoisted him onto her lap.  
"Thank you, baby. Your brother did well too, didn't he?"  
"Yes. Can we watch Meno?"  
With a laugh, Ziva told him they could and ordered Tony to get it ready with just a look, smirking as he complied immediately.

* * *

Yeaaaah. I know it's short. But they are all short. Okay well some information for you:

"Comptine" is "Comptine d'un autre été: l'apres midi", a song by Yann Tiersen which I reccomend you listen to. It's one of my favorites. But some of you might not like it, I don't know.

Dictionary:

Tateleh- little darling

Ima- mother; mom

Okay. Thanks for reading my nonsense! Much appreciated! (And so are reviews ;) ). I'll have an update up in ten to twenty minutes. :)

~NZA


	7. Sick as a Log

Allllright! Here's the next bit. Quite a long chapter, actually. Compared to the others, anyway. Read, review, and enjoy! ;)

* * *

Ziva awoke that morning to a faint whimpering noise. Pulling herself out of bed, she groggily made her way down the hall to where she thought the noise was emanating from. Stopping a minute to listen some more, she heard sniffling and strode quickly into Caleb's room.

"Caleb? What is the matter?" Ziva sat down on the bed next to the crying boy and began to stroke his hair soothingly.

"Ima. _Kar li_," Caleb whimpered. Ziva moved her hand down to his forehead, feeling it.

"You have a fever, my love. I guess I will be staying home with you today, hmm?"

"Yeah, Is Daddy going to work?" Caleb asked.

"Yes. One of us has to. Would you prefer your father to stay with you today instead?"

"Nooo. I want you, Ima," Caleb whined.

"Alright. I will stay. I need to go wake your father up because I do not believe the alarm was set last night. We were somewhat…preoccupied…" Ziva said with a slight smile.

"Ima, whas pweoccupied?"

"Nothing, tateleh. I will go wake your father and brother.

Ziva decided to get Tony up first. Walking back into their bedroom silently, she moved up to his side of the bed. She leaned down with her lips barely an inch from his ear and held her dark curls back so they would not tickle his face.

"Tony," she whispered. Then a little louder, "Wake up, my little hairy butt."

When all he did was grunt, Ziva decided to take it a step further. Leaning in closer, she licked his ear and patted his exposed butt before jumping out of the way.

Feeling this, Tony sprung upright on the bed in surprise, reminding Ziva of the time they spent undercover when she poured water on his head.

"What?" Tony shouted, ready to take action if need.

"Good morning, my love. Since we were so…busy…last night, I knew you had not set the alarm and I took the liberty of waking you up myself." Ziva chuckled.

"Gee, thanks, sweetcheeks. I really appreciate it." Tony was still standing on the bed and Ziva looked him up and down.

"Mmm," she said approvingly. "No problem. You have twenty minutes to get to work, though, so I suggest putting some clothes on. I quite like the view but I do not think Gibbs would. In fact, if you showed up like _that_, I think the head-slap he would issue you would be your last." Ziva flashed him a sultry smile and walked out of the room.

Tony pulled on some boxers as he trailed after her into Shai's room. "Hey, why aren't you getting ready? Gibbs'll slap you too if you're late for work."

"Caleb is sick. I am staying home with him today," she replied. Lifting Shai out of his crib, Ziva turned to face her husband, eyebrows raised. "Do you want to be late, Tony?" she asked. "Because I do not think Gibbs will be too happy, what with me not coming in and all."

"Right, uh… I'm goin' to get dressed and stuff. Be right back, sweetcheeks," Tony said and ran out of the room.

Ziva walked into the kitchen and picked up the house phone. She dialed Gibbs's number and put the phone to her ear. After three rings he finally picked up.

_"Gibbs."_

"Gibbs, it is Ziva. I will not be coming in today. Caleb is sick as a log," she informed him.

_"Dog, Ziva. Not log. He gonna be okay?"_

"Right. Yes, I am sure he will be fine. It is just a cold. Probably something he caught at daycare. I will most likely be back to work in a day or two. Unless Shai catches it."

_"It's fine, Ziva. I'll see ya when you get back."_

"Alright, Gibbs, thank you," Ziva replied, hanging up the phone. Still holding a drowsy Shai, she wandered back into Caleb's room holding a bottle of children's Tylenol that she had grabbed from the bathroom on her way by.

"Caleb. _Mah shlomecha_?"

"_Rah me'od_," the four-year-old replied.

"I am sorry, baby. Your Hebrew is getting much better though. Good job." Ziva set Shai down on the end of the bed and unscrewed the cap of the Tylenol. "I brought you some medicine. It will help you feel better. Here, sit up." Caleb sat up and Ziva poured some of the dark purple liquid into the little plastic cup that came attached to the bottle. She put it to her son's lips and he drank it, albeit reluctantly. He grimaced at the flavor of the syrupy medicine.

"Ick," Shai said, shaking his small head. "Mecine bad."

"Yes, but it helps, Shai," Ziva replied with a laugh and Caleb laughed too.

Just then, Tony ducked his head into the room. "Hey, Zee, I'm leavin'," he said. "Hope you feel better soon, buddy," he told Caleb and walked away. "Love you guys!" he called and shortly after they heard the sound of the garage door shutting.

Ziva chuckled and picked Shai up. "Come on, Shai. We should let you brother get some sleep."

"Ima?" Caleb called after her and Ziva turned to face him.

"Yes?"

"Daddy's going to be late for work, huh?"

Ziva laughed. "Yes, probably. _Chalomot tovin_, Caleb."

"Okay."

"'Night, Caleb! Sleep good!" Shai whispered loudly as his mother carried him out of the room with a smile.

* * *

I don't know when my next update will be. Hope you enjoyed this one! Reviews welcomed! Did anyone listen to that song I mentioned in the last chapter? ;)

Dictionary:

Kar li- I feel cold

Mah shlomecha?- How are you?

Rah me'od- Very bad

Chalomot tovin- Sweet dreams


	8. Remembrance

Sorry an update took so long! I've had this written for like two weeks and have just been to lazy to post it. Anyways, here it is. Read, review, and enjoy! :)

(Summary: Tony is remembering when he first learned he was going to be a father.)

* * *

The day was good. Caleb was no longer sick and Tony, Ziva, and Shai had all caught what he had but were also well once again. Ziva was at the grocery store with the boys while Tony sat on the couch at home, watching the Buckeyes play in a tournament. When the game ended, Tony heaved himself off the couch, turned off the TV, and cleaned up his garbage that was sitting on coffee table.

As he walked past a photograph of a smiling Ziva holding a baby Caleb in her arms, her reminisced about the moment when he learned he was going be a father.

_The morning had started off fine. He had woken up in bed with Ziva as he had for the past year. Later on the team was sitting in the squad room working on paperwork and Tony had a feeling something was wrong with Ziva. She was being quieter than usual and it worried him._

_He was relieved when Ziva finally said something to him but his heart sank as the words registered in his head. "Tony, I need to talk to you." Did she want a divorce? I thought we were happy, Tony thought. Yes, we are, stop worrying, Tony scolded himself as he nodded and followed Ziva to the elevator. McGee and Gibbs watched them go, curious._

_When the silver doors of the elevator slid shut, Ziva reached out and flipped the emergency switch, turning to Tony. "Tony, I-" she began but he cut her off._

_"Ziva, we can work this out!" he said without thinking._

_"Work what out, Tony?" Ziva asked, momentarily distracted from what she was originally going to tell him._

_"Us. If you're unhappy, I'll fix it. I'll do anything! Just don't be mad at me," Tony pleaded._

_"Tony," Ziva chuckled. "I am not mad at you. And I am not unhappy."_

_"You- You're not?" Tony replied, suddenly realizing how ridiculous he was being._

_"No." Ziva laughed again._

_"Oh… Then what did you want to talk to me about?"_

_"I…" Ziva hesitated a moment before bringing herself to finally say it. "I am pregnant, Tony."_

_He stood there in shock, unable to form any coherent thoughts, much less words. And then he smiled his thousand-watt grin and scooped his unsuspecting wife up into a huge Abbyesque hug. Though he was still a bit shocked and kind of nervous about the prospect of having a child, he also thrilled. "I'm gonna be a father!" he shouted, a little bit too loudly for being in a confined space such as the elevator._

_"Tony," Ziva whispered._

_"Yeah, sweetcheeks?"_

_"I cannot breathe. Let me go or I will hurt you!"_

_"Right. Heh, sorry, Zee-vah."_

_"So you are happy?" Ziva asked tentatively and absentmindedly rubbed a hand over her still-flat stomach._

_"Yeah, sweetcheeks, course I am!" Tony grinned again. "And I'm sure I am going to be a way better father than mine ever was. I'm gonna make it happen, Zee. For you and the baby."_

_"Good, Tony, I am glad," Ziva replied and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips. Then a mischievous glint shone in her eye. She flipped the emergency switch again and turned to him. "You get to tell Gibbs," Ziva told him and rain out the half-opened elevator doors before Tony could grab her._

"Deep in thought?" Her voice startled him out of his reverie and he spun to face her.

"I was. Welcome back," Tony said and pulled Ziva in for a kiss. They broke apart when the need for oxygen became too great and smiled. "I didn't hear you guys come in."

"What were you thinking that had you so distracted, hmm?" Ziva asked, a teasing glint in her eyes.

"Weelllll. I'm thinking maybe the boys could go to bed a little early tonight."

"Mmm." Ziva gave him a sultry smile. "Good idea, my love."

Smiling in return, Tony followed her out of the kitchen to help with the rest of the groceries.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Check out the poll on my profile too! :)


	9. Paint

After forever, here's a new chapter. It's super short but a chapter is a chapter, right? Thanks for reading and enjoy.

When Ziva and Caleb came home from grocery shopping, they found a giggling Shai on the other side of the door. He was covered head to toe in red paint. Ziva sighed and set the groceries on the kitchen counter before picking the toddler up and holding him at arm's length away from her body.

"What happened to you, my love?" she asked the boy.

"Daddy paint his toobox an' I help," Shai replied proudly.

Ziva smiled at him and rolled her eyes. "Tony! Where are you?"

Suddenly the man in question came around the corner. He too had red paint on him, though not nearly as much as his youngest son.

Tony gave a nervous laugh as he noticed his wife standing in the kitchen and holding their paint covered child. "Heeeeyy, Zee-vah! What are you doing home so soon?"

Rather than answer his question, she asked one of her own. "WHY did you let Shai ANYWHERE near the paint, Tony?"

"Well, you see, it was kinda an accident. I was repainting my toolbox in the garage and the bucket of paint sort of fell of the table and splattered everywhere. Then Shai started ah... playing in it and I accidentally joined in." He gave another nervous laugh.

"Well then I guess you will have to 'accidentally' go clean the garage and yourselves, hmm?" But they both knew it wasn't really a question.

"Yep, gettin' right on that, sweetcheeks!" He took a squirming Shai from Ziva and headed to the bathroom.

Once they were gone, Caleb and Ziva turned to each other and rolled their eyes.

"They really messed up this time, huh, Mom?" Caleb asked her.

"Oh yes, _tateleh_. But don't they always?"


	10. Babies

DD Ch.10

"Dad?"

"Yeah, Caleb?"

"Where do babies come from?"

Tony nearly choked on the donut he was eating. One of these days these kids were going to kill him. "Uh, I'll tell you when you're older, buddy, okay?"

Caleb sighed. "Why can't you tell me now?"

"Because you're too young, kid. You won't understand."

"Yes I will." Caleb pouted.

"Nope."

"Fine," the boy huffed, crossing his arms. "When will I be old enough?"

"When you're in high school," Tony shoved the last of his donut in his mouth and turned in the chair to face his son.

"How long is that?"

"Ten years."

Caleb sighed again. "That's too long. Maybe you should just tell me now."

"Or maybe I shouldn't." Tony smiled down at the persistent child.

"But it's urgent, dad. I need to know as soon as possible."

"Urgent? Where did you even learn that word?" Tony asked.

Caleb shrugged. "I dunno. But it is. Urgent."

"Okay… Why is it so urgent? Why do you need to know where babies come from so badly?"

"Because I need to know where I can get one."

"Why would you need to know that?" Now Tony was just confused.

"I need a brother or a sister."

"You've already got a little brother, Caleb. You've got Shai."

"Yeah but I think I want to exchange him for a sister or a better brother," Caleb said seriously.

Tony feigned absolute shock. "Why would you want to do that? Don't you love Shai?"

"I guess so, but I'm kinda bored of him. I need a new brother. Or a sister. I've never had a sister before."

"I see. Well sorry, buddy, but I still can't tell you where babies come from. Only grown-ups are allowed to… go there."

Caleb sighed for a third time. "Well can you go there and get me a sister and a new brother?"

"No, I don't think I can. Besides, I'd have to ask your mom. Mommies and daddies have to get the baby together." Tony was hoping the boy would just drop it but had no such luck.

"Okay, then take Mom with you, go to the baby place and get a baby to put in her tummy. I think I want a sister so if they have one, get one of those," Caleb commanded.

Tony laughed. "It's not that easy, Caleb. Moms and dads don't get to decide if they get a boy or a girl."

"But-"

Tony interrupted. "Tell you what, dude. I'll talk to your mom about getting another brother or sister if you go clean your room and play with your current brother. Deal?"

Once again, Caleb sighed. Then he smiled. "Deal. Get to it right away." Then he ran off down the hall, nearly knocking Ziva down.

"Why is he in such a hurry?" she asked her husband, giving him a kiss. He deepened it until the need for oxygen was too much and they had to pull away.

"Cal wants a new sibling. Preferably a sister. I told him I'd discuss um… going and getting one with you."

"Going and getting one? They do not just sell babies at the grocery store Tony." Ziva smiled at him and ran a finger down his chest. "We have to… make them, yes?"

Tony cleared his throat, trying to restrain the tightening of his pants. "Yeah. But I couldn't exactly tell him that. Do you want another kid?"

"Honestly? I would not mind having a little girl. You?"

"Yeah, that would be nice. Are we going to honor Caleb's request?"

"Maybe…" She ran her finger down his chest again, this time going all the way down to the bulge at the top of his pants. "Maybe we can start tonight. If we can get Gibbs or Abby and McGee to watch the boys."

Tony pushed his chair back and stood abruptly. "I'll call right now. We should start as soon as possible." He eagerly ran to the phone as Ziva stood shaking her head and smiling in amusement.


	11. The Baby Store

They had gotten Gibbs to agree to watch the boys, telling him there were some things they needed to do and they couldn't have them there. So now here he sat, on his couch, watching Shai dismember an action figure as Caleb sat next to him on the couch reading a book. It was a book Gibbs himself had gotten the boy, one of those step-up-to-reading ones about sharks.

"Good book?" Gibbs asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Uh huh," Caleb responded.

On the floor, his younger brother was yanking on the arm of the action figure. Finally, it came loose, flinging out of the two year old's hand and flying across the room to hit the living room wall. At this, the toddler burst into giggles and began working on the other arm. Gibbs smiled and shook his head. There was no denying that these were the children of his agents.

"Do ya know where your parents went?" he asked Caleb. He took another gulp of coffee as the boy answered.

"Yeah, they went to go get another baby."

Gibbs nearly choked on his coffee. That explained why Ziva and DiNozzo had been in such a hurry." Oh yeah?"

"Uh huh. I said to get me a sister 'cause I already have a brother," Caleb pointed to Shai, as if Gibbs needed reminding of that fact, "but they said the baby store doesn't let you pick if you get a boy or a girl."

"The baby store?"

"Yes, that's where they're going. To get the baby."

"I see," Gibbs replied, forcing back a grin as he took another sip of coffee.

"And I think the store must be far away and that's why we are sleeping here at your house tonight. Plus, my dad says kids aren't allowed in the baby store. Which I think is weird because a few days ago I saw this show on TV called '16 and pregnant' and I think that means that a sixteen year old is having a baby, but I'm not sure since my dad changed the channel really fast. But if a person that is sixteen is having a baby, that means they went to the baby store to get it. But... sixteen means they are still a kid, right? Or does 'kid' mean under twelve like at restaurants and stuff?" Yes, no doubt this boy was a DiNozzo. He'd certainly inherited his father's gift- or curse- of gab.

"I dunno, Caleb. Sounds complicated to me."

"Yeah," the boy sighed.

"How 'bout I make you and Shai a snack? Ya hungry?"

Caleb grinned. "Yeah. I'm always hungry." Loquacity wasn't the only thing the kid inherited from his father, Gibbs thought.


	12. We're Screwed

Here's another chapter for you guys. Please pardon the brevity and enjoy! Oh, and thanks for reading :)

* * *

"Do you think Gibbs suspects?" Ziva asked her husband as they moved up their boss's front porch.

"Doubt it."

She opened the door- it was unlocked and knocking was unnecessary at Leroy Jethro Gibbs's house- and the couple stepped inside. Both Tony and Ziva's hearts nearly stopped when they rounded the corner into the living room and found their fearless leader sitting on the couch and staring them down.

"H-hey, Boss," Tony greeted. "Just here to pick up the boys."

Gibbs nodded. "I know. Their nappin' in my room." There was a moment of awkward silence. "So," Gibbs began, "How was the baby store?"

Ziva's jaw dropped and Tony began coughing- or choking, nobody was sure which- while Gibbs remained seated on the couch, a small, pleased-as-punch smile on his face. That had almost been better than a headslap- almost.

Finally, Tony's fit stopped and he asked, "Wh-what do you mean, Boss?"

"Ah, c'mon, DiNozzo. Your son told me all about it." Gibbs said. His smile was beginning to freak his agents out. Gibbs barely ever smiled. Then he laughed. _Laughed_! "I'll go get Caleb and Shai." He stood, set the mug of coffee he was clutching on the table, and left the room.

Tony and Ziva gawked and stared at each other, wide eyed.

"We're screwed," Tony declared.


	13. Forbidden Pastries and Pink Boxes

So I got an anonymous review asking me a question and, since I cannot reply to anonymous reviews, I decided to write a new chapter and answer the question in my AN. So anonymous reviewer TivaJibbsMcAbbyBabies asked: How exactly do you pronounce Shai? And the answer to that would be that I myself pronounce it 'Shay' but I believe it can also be pronounced 'Shy' so whichever you prefer, I guess. Anyway, on with the chapter. It's pretty long as far as chapters go in this fic. Enjoy!

* * *

"I got it."  
"Got what?"  
"A test."  
It had been two and a half weeks since they had been busted by Gibbs. Shai and Caleb were at the McGee's place that day, having a playdate with Jacob and Katie. Now Tony stood in front of his wife where she lay on the couch with a book. He was waving a pink and purple box around in the air next to his head.  
"What kind of test?" Ziva asked, though she already knew. Sometimes it was fun just to tease him.  
Tony frowned. "A pregnancy test. I think it's been long enough since... That we can test with some reliable results."  
Ziva's eyebrows rose. "We?"  
"Well, uh, you. You can test."  
The former assassin sighed and closed her book. Obviously, she would not be getting any reading in while the kids were away. She still had another, much larger one standing in front of her to take care of.  
"Why can't we just have Abby test my blood on Monday?" she asked. "I feel like that would be more reliable."  
Tony shrugged and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Yeah, well, we will. After you take this test."  
"What if it comes up negative?"  
"We'll ask Abby to retest."  
"And positive?"  
"Same. Just to make sure."  
Ziva sighed again, rolling her eyes. "And what if I refuse to take this test? We only had that one night, Tony." She paused thoughtfully. "Except for last night... And a few nights ago. But it is too soon for results if I got pregnant then. Besides, it may not happen in just one try."  
Now it was Tony's turn to raise his eyebrows. "One? If I remember correctly, we did it several times that night." He waggled his raised brows suggestively.  
"Okay, one NIGHT. In just one night."  
Tony shook the box and sighed in exasperation. "C'mon, Zee-vah! Just take the test!" At her look, he added, "Please? For me?" He shot her his 'patented' DiNozzo grin.  
"Fine," Ziva huffed, snatching the box from Tony's hand and shoving past him to head towards the nearest bathroom.  
Two minutes later, Tony heard the toilet flush, the sink run, the towel ring squeak, and then Ziva emerged from the bathroom.  
"So?" he asked hopefully.  
Ziva rolled her eyes. "Tony, it has only been a minute. We still have another two."  
"Fine," Tony grumbled, wandering off to the kitchen for a snack. He returned a moment later, munching on a DingDong.  
Ziva glared. "I thought I told you to stop buying those. They are horrible for you."  
Tony stopped mid-chew and shrugged. "I rike dem," he explained around a mouthful of chocolate cake and cream.  
Ziva punched his arm, then brought the hand up to massage her temples.  
"Hey!" he yelped. It was silent for a moment. "Has it been two minutes yet?"  
Ziva smiled, running her finger down his chest, stopping just before the slight bulge in his jeans. Her smile got bigger as his eyes widened. "I believe it has," she replied in a sultry voice.  
Tony shoved the rest of the Hostess pastry into his mouth. "Well come on, let's check it!"  
"Alright." She sashayed back into the bathroom and Tony couldn't help but stare for a moment before running after her.  
"Positive?" he asked, looking over her shoulder. "Negative?"  
Ziva shrugged and reached out to turn the test over, revealing the circle displaying a small pink "+."  
"Yes!" Tony cheered, pumping the air with his fist.  
"Remember, Tony, these things are not one hundred percent accurate," Ziva said, despite the fact that she, too, was grinning from ear to ear.  
"Yeah, yeah, but it's like, ninety-nine percent. Which is good enough for now. And like you said, we can have Abby test you again on Monday."  
"Yes-" she was effectively silenced as he spun her around and covered her lips with his.  
They pulled apart when the need for oxygen became apparent. "Hey," he whispered breathlessly. "For now, let's just celebrate."  
And she conceded, allowing him to lead her back to the bedroom, leaving a trail of clothing in their wake.


	14. Plane Crash

She was almost five months pregnant now, showing, and forbidden from doing fieldwork. She spent most of her non-working hours in the building in Abby's lab- often with both Abby's children and her own- and the rest going back and forth from the bathroom. Today was not dissimilar. She was seated with her back against the desk on the floor of Abby's center lab- more of an office- playing with as well as being entertained by the four children.

Jacob McGee had turned four just the week prior and was still sporting the paper crown with a large '4' on it which, Abby had informed her, he had refused to take off except for bath time. His sister, Katy, was seated in Ziva's lap, gently caressing her swollen abdomen and occasionally whispering the word 'baby.'

Her own youngest- for the moment at least- lay flush up against her thigh, taking a nap. Caleb, the oldest of the bunch by a few months, was gallivanting around the room with Jacob, toy planes in the hands raised above their heads.

"My wing fell off!" Jake shouted, rocking the toy plane in his grip. "I need ta make a crash lanning!" The he made a buzzing noise and tossed the plane to the floor, where it bounced twice before skidding across the ground to land under his mother's table in the center of the room.

"Oh no!" Caleb cried running towards the 'crash site.' "I'll save your passagers!"

Ziva chuckled and ran her fingers through Shai's thick, light brown hair. She wasn't concerned about the noise waking him; the two-year-old could sleep through just about anything. The former assassin gazed down at the small Abby look-alike in her lap. Katy had also fallen asleep, cheek pressed to Ziva's stomach and drool running down her chin to land on Ziva's shirt.

Secretly, Ziva hoped that a little girl of her own was developing inside her, though she would be perfectly happy if it was to be another boy. She and Tony had a doctor's appointment tomorrow. It was THE appointment and they would find out if the old baby boy clothes could be reused or remain in storage. Pink or blue?

Tomorrow just seemed so far away.


	15. The Darnedest Things, part 1

While Tony and Caleb had 'Daddy and Caleb Day,' Ziva decided to take Shai to the grocery store.

She pushed the cart through the store, Shai in the child's seat, and the little boy patted his mother's six-months-pregnant belly. They turned down the cereal and juice aisle and Ziva eyed the selection, pulling the cart out of the way as an elderly woman passed.

"Shai, do you want apple juice or grape juice?" asked Ziva.

She was startled by Shai's unnecessarily loud reply of, "Rape!"

The elderly woman stared over her shoulder in shock and Ziva slapped a hand to her forehead. "Grape it is, then," she said, and placed a bottle in the cart, hurrying to grab a box of Kix and get out of the aisle.

"Mom?" Shai leaned forward, pressing his face to Ziva's distended belly.

"Yes, my love?"

"Why baby in dere?" He sniffed her shirt and then tilted his head up to stare at her with inquisitive green eyes.

Ziva's brows furrowed as she contemplated how best to explain it. "To keep the baby safe while it grows," she responded finally, turning down another aisle.

"Will it come out?"

"Yes." She scanned the shelves for the apple scented kids' shampoo the boys liked. "In a few months, you and Caleb will have a little brother or sister." At her last appointment, Ziva and Tony had made a split-second decision to keep the gender a surprise again. Ah, there it was. She grabbed the shampoo and headed towards the the Pull Ups. Shai was nearly potty-trained, only needing the Pull Ups at night for safe measure.

"Oh."

At that moment, a woman in about her late-twenties approached with googly eyes and a wide grin. "Ohh, how far along are you?" she asked, staring at Ziva's belly. "I just love babies and children! I'm a pediatric nurse."

Ziva, though she found women who gushed over pregnancies quite annoying, smiled politely. "Six months," she replied.

"Wonderful. Do you know the gender?" The woman looked ready to touch Ziva's stomach. The former assassin's knife hand twitched.

"No, my husband and I want to be surprised."

The woman turned to Shai with a smile. "Hi, there. Are you excited to be a big brother?"

Shai frowned. "Back off, stwanger."

Ziva's jaw dropped. Where he had learned 'back off,' she had no idea. "Shai!" She glanced at the woman apologetically. "I am sorry about that."

The woman chuckled and nodded. "It's fine. You've got him well trained in avoiding strangers." She hitched her purse up on her shoulder and smiled. "Congratulations on the pregnancy. Bye bye, sweetie," she waved and walked away.

Ziva sighed, shaking her head. "That was not nice, tateleh."

"Stwangers steal babies," the toddler declared, patting her belly. "I jus potectin' baby."


	16. The Darnedest Things, part 2

"Okay, Cal. It's just you and me," Tony said, patting his son on the head. "Whaddya want to do?"

"Umm... Read?" The boy shrugged.

Tony made a face. "_Read_? I meant something fun, kid."

"Reading _is_ fun, Daddy."

"You're definitely your mother's son," he sighed. "Okay, something _besides_ reading that's fun."

"Can we go to that glow-in-the-dark golf place?" Caleb asked enthusiastically.

Tony grinned and opened the car door for him. "Now, you're talkin'. Of course we can."

"And then we'll go to the play place, alright?" The 'play place' was a large, indoor jungle gym/play structure that Tony and Ziva occasionally took the boys to.

"Sure, buddy. Whatever you want, we'll do it. You and I have the whole day to spend together."

"That's right. So I'm basically king of fun decisions today," said Caleb.

"Oh, really?"

"Pretty much. It doesn't matter where we go, though. All I'm saying is, we're goin' places. Fun places."

Tony laughed. "Yeah, I guess we are."

* * *

The Glow Golf

They were on one of the last holes at the mini golf and having a great father/son bonding experience, in Tony's opinion. Deciding to try and impress the four-year-old, he removed both glow-in-the-dark golf balls from the hole and began juggling them as he made his way to the next hole, waggling his black-lit eyebrows.

Tony nearly choked on his own saliva when Caleb yelled, loud enough for everyone in the building to hear, "Dad! Stop playing with your balls! We've got a game to finish!"

Tony dropped the golf balls and smacked his forehead

* * *

The Play Place

Tony had let Caleb play for an hour- even played with him whenever possible- and now they were leaving to go have lunch.

"Alright, dude, get your shoes on and we'll go have pizza."

"Awesome," Caleb responded, pulling on his black Converse sneakers. He looked just like Ziva but his eating habits greatly resembled his father's.

Tony stared at his son's feet, amused. "Hey, Cal, buddy, your shoes are on the wrong feet."

Caleb looked down and then up at his father, a puzzled expression on his face. "You've gotta be kidding me, Dad. These are the only feet I've got!"

Tony laughed the entire ride home.


	17. Just a Bit of Soul Searching

Tony walked into the living room and found Caleb sitting on the floor, legs crossed, eyes closed, and arms up at ninety degree angles with the thumb and index finger of each hand touching, like some form of meditation pose.

"Caleb, what are you doing? Meditating?"

The boy opened his eyes. "No, Dad," he replied, as though what he _was_ doing should be completely obvious. "I'm soul searching." His eyes closed again as he went back to 'soul searching.'

Tony grinned in amusement. "You're searching your soul?" he asked. "For what?"

Caleb opened his eyes again, dropping his arms and staring at Tony in exasperation. "I'm not searching MY soul! I'm searching for the baby's soul. That way, I can ask it if it's a boy or a girl, since you and Ima won't tell me."

Tony chuckled. "And how's that working for ya?"

Caleb frowned. "Not so good, I'm afraid. Soul searching's not so easy as it sounds. It's nothing like searching for the prize in the cereal box. It's almost as hard as searching my room for a pacific toy."

Tony shrugged. "Then I guess you'll just have to wait 'til the baby's born like the rest of us."

The little boy sighed and flopped back onto the carpet. "Waiting is harder than soul searching!" he exclaimed.

"It's just two more months, Cal."

"Yeah, tell that to the kid that has to live in Ima's tummy. It doesn't know if it should like pink or blue! Dolls or cars! Princesses or dragons that spit fire and eat princesses!" Caleb smacked the back of his hand to his forehead dramatically. "This is a disaster!"

"It'll all work out, buddy," Tony told him seriously, biting back laughter.

The boy stood, shoved his hands in his pockets, and shook his head. "I guess you're right," he said. "C'mon. I need some Jell-o, but I'm too short to reach it."


	18. Doctor, Doctor

It's true. I'm alive. I have emerged from the belly of the beast known as school, and I had to claw my way through masses of homework to do so. But, I come bearing gifts in the form of updates for some of my stories.

So this has actually happened before. Not with these characters, of course (since that is impossible) but it has happened in my life- inspired by a little kid I know, because, well, kids just say the darnedest things, which makes for great inspiration. Anyway, read on, please enjoy, and review if you feel like it.

* * *

Ziva ushered her eldest son into the pediatrician's office, where several other children clambered across the carpet, playing with toys, screaming, and wiping runny noses on already filthy shirtsleeves. She pulled Caleb up to the check-in desk, where she stood as close as she could with a rotund pregnant belly.

She was only a week from her due date, and she knew she should be resting, but that was something she rarely did- regardless of the circumstances. In this case, her husband was currently at home, going through tissue boxes as quickly as he was going through movies as he and Shai suffered through a cold the boy had brought home from daycare. Luckily, it appeared Caleb had been spared thus far and Ziva had been avoiding the two at all costs, so she, too, was sniffle-free. Which left her as the only parent available to take Cal for his check-up, because, being the strong-willed, independent person that she is, Ziva would rather waddle around on her swollen feet than call on the team for reinforcements.

She signed him in, then lead him over to the quieter fish tank area, as far from the screaming and toy-torturing as possible. Only a couple parents and one child- a thankfully silent girl of about ten whose nose was buried in a book- waited here, away from the chaos that was 'The Play Zone.'

Ziva sighed as she eased herself into a chair. Caleb crawled onto the one beside her. He put his small hand on her protruding abdomen.

"Is the baby kicking?" he whispered.

Ziva smiled, placing her hand over his own. "Of course. Kicking and kicking and kicking. He or she will never let me rest."

Caleb grinned. "Did I kick so much when I was in your tummy?"

"Not nearly this much. But you did like to kick. When I was at work sometimes, Gibbs would send me home because I could not focus."

"That's funny."

Ten more minutes passed before a nurse came through the door.

"Caleb David-DiNozzo."

Caleb hopped down from his chair as Ziva heaved herself out of hers and they followed the nurse down the back hallway to an exam room.

"Dr. Freedman will be with you shortly," she said, and left.

Three minutes passed before the doctor knocked and entered. He was a new doctor, brought in when their last one retired, so Ziva hadn't yet met him. He was younger, maybe Ziva's age, with short brown hair and a friendly smile, wearing khaki slacks with a dark green sweater over a white collared shirt. She pushed herself up from the bench in the corner of the room and moved to shake his hand.

"Hi, Mrs. DiNozzo, is it? I'm Doctor Cooper Freedman. I assume you were informed of Dr. Hanson's retirement?"

Ziva nodded as she slowly sat back down. "Yes, I was. And Ziva is fine."

He smiled and turned to Caleb, who was contemplating the doctor with a furrowed brow- one of his highly Ziva-esque attributes.

"You must be Caleb," said the doctor. "Hi, I'm Dr. Freedman." A hand was held out, but not taken.

Ziva frowned. "Caleb-"

The boy interrupted then, head tilted as he said, "You're not a doctor. Where's your white coat?"


	19. Three's Company

Tony and Shai were finally over their colds three days later and Caleb and Ziva still seemed to have been gratefully spared. It was a sunny Sunday afternoon, with no running cases, so Tony was at home, playing with the boys in the backyard while Ziva remained inside on bed rest - grudgingly.

Heaving out a breath, she pressed a hand to her still heavily pregnant belly and waddled from the bathroom for the second time in the past hour. As she was lowering herself onto the bed, Ziva felt a tight, intense pain radiate through her abdomen. The pain was all too familiar and it quickly dissipated. Her eyes widened, however, when another contraction hit only two minutes later. Having experienced two fairly consistent pregnancies already, the seemingly fast progression of this one took her by surprise.

She hurried to the dresser to retrieve the go bags they had prepared the week before in anticipation of this very event, pausing to brace herself as she was gripped by another contraction. Once it passed, she snatched up the bags and shuffled to the staircase. She was almost at the bottom when the next contraction came and gritted her teeth as she continued.

Ziva walked a few more steps, threw the bags down - Tony could take it from there - and then yelled her husband's name.

* * *

They had been expecting this moment to come for a week now, but Tony was no less taken aback by Ziva's shout ringing in his ears as he prepared to throw a football to his eldest son. The moment he registered what was happening, he tossed the ball to the grass, grabbed Shai under one arm, and ushered Caleb into the house at a jog.

"This is it boys! Almost time to meet your new brother or sister!"

"Right now? Yay!" Caleb did a fist pump in the air and at his mother's urging, helped his father carry the bags out to the car.

Seat belts were hastily buckled, numbers of team members haphazardly dialed, the car driven a little faster than was strictly legal, and less than two hours later Tony, Shai, and Caleb were gathered around Ziva and the newest member of the NCIS crew: a seven-pound, five-ounce baby girl. Talia Abigail David-Dinozzo.

Her eyes were still the deep blue shared by nearly every newborn, but Tony was convinced they would soon be the same rich chocolate brown as her mother's. As for the rest of her tiny features, they already hinted at a girl as equally stunning as the woman who gave birth to her, leaving her proud dad certain that he would need to be keeping his gun handy.

With parting kisses pressed to the foreheads of his girls, Tony took the boys and left them to get some sleep.


End file.
